Happily Ever After...

Sometimes I know im good company and at other times i think im just convenient company. And it really sucks when I dont know which I am with you.


I wish i wasnt so jealous of other peoples lives. When i hear about how happy they are, how perfect their life seems now that they are in a new relationship or in love, I blame you Hollywood and Disney for making up your silly little love stories for such an impressionable little girl, where is my fairytale? my happily ever after?  thats what I thought.
but a girl can still dream...

Ive Forgotten How To Dream.....

I Am Me...

I had to make this project for Design where i describe myself to a perfect stranger visually. We had to create something that folds together so your 'stranger' can unfold your origami and find out who you are. I never know what i should tell people about myself, i mean its much easier writing it on a piece of paper and giving it away then acctually having to confront the topic face to face. I just dont know whats too much info.Most people dont know a lot about me except for the surface stuff, i like trees, colourfull things and i believe in kindness.cute.
There is more to me then that, i just bury stuff so its easier. I ended up having a good variety of  info though some light sunshine things as well as some deeper insights buried in the center of my origami crane/heart.

Id like to learn how to do art therapy, if only for myself so i can dig up all that has been buried maybe some sweet art will come out of it who knows.

Im excited to see what my strangers response will be

Ive been doing that thing again... you know thinking.  And ive come to a great understanding of where im at. Sometimes i find it hard being out here on the east coast a million miles from all that is familiar and what feels like home, and my closest friends and the 'normalness' of life. but home is where the heart is and right now mine is in Halifax. I get friend sick all the time because all of my closest friends are scattered, pittsburg,washington dc,victoria,oregon,calgary, germany,squamish,ottawa,halifax.
and sometimes i just want us all to live in the same place at the same time so i can enjoy their company at any time. Its such fun when i finally get to talk with them or even get a chance to hangout with them, we share our experiences and silly stories and just pick up where we left off haha as if no time has actually passed but it also makes me kinda of sad because i dont know when im gonna talk to them again, next week in a month in 3? But distance makes the heart grow fonder.
Im so proud of them all for following their dreams and moving away to be able to experience all that life can give them and i guess thats why im here too, to get re-inspired and to always know that no matter where i go i still keep you all in my heart.

Grow Into Your Own

Today was a really beautiful day, all the fears i had yesterday about my life, friends and school all just sort of dissolved today. I spent nearly 6 hours in the studio today working on my final project for modeled forms. It was one of the greatest feelings, just getting to work on art that im really passionate about and having the time to create it. Also there were so many people coming in and out of the studio space, i never felt bored or lonely, i didnt even need music i was just in the groove of the piece. A taped body cast tree. Its a self portrait in a sense. It feels good when i can get attached to my art, i mean frick thats why im here to learn how to get attached to all the work that i create haha. I cant wait till the summer when i can start weaving. yahoo

Need I Say More

Cradle What You Carry

I went and saw the Vagina Monologues tonight and it blew me away.
It made me feel empowered as a woman but still left me feeling guilty for all of those women around the world who do not have the same power and are forced into things like the sex trade and genital mutilation and I dont even know where to begin to help them.

Im trying to make a taped body cast of a tree for my Modeled Forms class, and I got really into it without really understanding how it would look once the limbs were cast and how much time and effort and help im acctually going to need in order to complete this project. mostly i just need help cutting myself free of the taped casts but it still requires that someone be there for most pieces, and for that i feel guilty, because my friends do have other projects they need to be working on, perhaps ill just have to pool my resources a little. I also dont know how much of my body to incorporate, I can picture the body being upright more then growing out of the earth upside down, although it would look more explosive,bahh...

Lately ive been so tired, its hard to will myself out of bed and so easy to slip in. Life seems much more daunting these days and the excitement doesnt last very long, im still so bloody nervous about things I wish I wasnt dammit I need goals i need to feel like im doing something with these days not just sittin on my rump de bump.